Frustration can actually be a really useful emotion - it tells us to have a look at what's really going on and make a change.
Read moreIntentions vs. Goals
What’s the difference between intention setting and goal setting? And why is it important?
This is a great time of year to reflect and be playful and curious about what 2020 could have in store.
So as usual with this blog, take what resonates and discard what doesn’t...
In my experience goals are about deciding on a specific outcome and often creating sub goals or steps towards achieving that outcome. They tend to be binary- either you achieve them or you don’t.
They tend to require a push. A striving, driven kind of energy. Problem solving. Deadlines. Get it done.
Intentions are softer. They’re similar in the sense you create an outcome that you want. They require you’re even clearer on WHY you want it (even more so than goals).
Intentions leave space for the ‘how’ to materialise more through intuition and open-minded focus. This doesn’t mean sitting on your yoga mat expecting your outcome to materialise overnight, but it does mean being open to the multiple different ways you could achieve the outcome. There’s less insistence that it has to happen a certain way.
This has been radical for me personally. I’ve always been a goal setter, until 2019 when I thought why the hell not, I’ll try something different.
I’ve achieved more in business this year (progress, events, speaker invites, client impact) as a result. Because instead of dogmatically forcing momentumon one particular action, I’ve asked myself ‘what can I do today, that feels good, that could lead towards my outcome’.
It became more fun and less strivy.
It worked for me so I’m sharing it with you.
How to go about it? Start with the self reflection questions I shared last week and then ask yourself what outcomes you want in 2020.
Gently pose the question now and then give yourself a couple of weeks off. No active thinking. You’ve planted the seed.
Just be open and notice when the quiet voice in your head (vs. the loud, opinionated one) shares ideas.
I’d love to hear what you’ll be working towards next year, hit reply and let me know :)
Have a fabulous Christmas with family and friends. We’ll take a break from the blog next week and I’ll be back in your inbox 1 Jan to wish you a fabulously delightful, fun-filled, adventurous 2020.
It's time to assess your stress
This week I want to check your stress levels. Because I'm worried that people feeling overwhelmed at work is becoming the new normal.
Having a bit of pressure can help us perform at our best. So I've been reading more about resilience with the aim of helping us to find that balance - the elusive peak performance before stress becomes too much.
Have a quick read about the Human Function Curve - this article discusses the following graph:
You'll see that peak performance happens when we're stretched outside our comfort zone, but haven't tipped over the edge into overwhelm or ill health.
So where are you on the overload scale:
- a comfortable stretch?
- an uncomfortable stretch?
- overload?
In my experience, people often answer that they're stretched, borderline stressed, but coping. This is a dangerous place to be for extended periods of time.
So it's important you get clear on your own warning indicators. Here are some questions to help:
- what happens when you're in overload? What would you notice?
- what are the first signs that you are feeling stressed?
- what happens if it gets worse? Where might it lead?
The purpose of this is to catch it early so that you notice, draw back and regenerate your energy.
So whilst I hope you're currently feeling good about your work and managing the balance, it's worth taking 10 minutes to answer these questions so that you're well prepared to notice the signs if the pressure rises.
P.S. Peak performance is about operating under a bit of pressure at the edge of our comfort zone. But it's important we know our own warning signs so we don't tip over into stress.
How empathy could be getting in your way
Every strength has a shadow side to watch out for. With high empathy skills you could be spending too much time in other people’s heads…
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